i feel like blogging
but i don't have anything in particular to blog about. i am so impressed by my cousin, she can take a string of thoughts about bumper stickers and turn it into a cohesive essay-like post - find a theme of some worth in a subject so apparently mundane.
it's 1:23 p.m. and i am still in my pajamas, as is musa. BUT i managed to get a couple of tablespoons of cereal and a few baby spoons of homemade apricot puree into him about an hour ago, so i don't feel as though the morning is completely wasted.
right now we are sitting in the living room, i on the laptop, he crawling around and playing with his toys.
have you ever seen "trainspotting"? remember the baby crawling on the ceiling during ewan macgregor's heroin withdrawal? those jerky, almost robotic movements? well, it's a bit of a grotesque comparison, but that's what musa's crawling reminds me of. he's definitely gotten the hang of it, mashallah, but he's still a little wobbly and hesitant in his control. it's utterly adorable - especially when he stops and looks at me and smiles, like he just did now :D
musa began "real" crawling and sitting up by himself - back so straight! - within the last 10 days of ramadan, mashallah. that means something must have gone right, i hope... i was hoping to have some greater sense of spiritual accomplishment at the end of this ramadan than the last, so my plan was to read the entire qur'an with translation, for the first time in my 28 years, pathetic as that might be. but i only made it to th 19th juz'. it was a lot easier to stay awake while i was fasting, which i did the first 8 days straight and then on and off for the rest of the month. i'm feeling now like i should have maybe not fasted at all - a bit worried about my milk supply and musa's nutrition. inshallah if there was any damage it will soon be resolved.
this feels like one of those useless journal entries i used to write... here's what i did today, here's what's on my mind, blah blah blah. my small, insignificant world. any thoughts worth thinking, or sentiments worth feeling, are swamped under sludge at the bottom of the lake. ramadan should have cleared that sludge somewhat, but it's like it surged back - i LET it surge back - even before eid was upon me.
musa is starting to whine, and i must eat...
it's 1:23 p.m. and i am still in my pajamas, as is musa. BUT i managed to get a couple of tablespoons of cereal and a few baby spoons of homemade apricot puree into him about an hour ago, so i don't feel as though the morning is completely wasted.
right now we are sitting in the living room, i on the laptop, he crawling around and playing with his toys.
have you ever seen "trainspotting"? remember the baby crawling on the ceiling during ewan macgregor's heroin withdrawal? those jerky, almost robotic movements? well, it's a bit of a grotesque comparison, but that's what musa's crawling reminds me of. he's definitely gotten the hang of it, mashallah, but he's still a little wobbly and hesitant in his control. it's utterly adorable - especially when he stops and looks at me and smiles, like he just did now :D
musa began "real" crawling and sitting up by himself - back so straight! - within the last 10 days of ramadan, mashallah. that means something must have gone right, i hope... i was hoping to have some greater sense of spiritual accomplishment at the end of this ramadan than the last, so my plan was to read the entire qur'an with translation, for the first time in my 28 years, pathetic as that might be. but i only made it to th 19th juz'. it was a lot easier to stay awake while i was fasting, which i did the first 8 days straight and then on and off for the rest of the month. i'm feeling now like i should have maybe not fasted at all - a bit worried about my milk supply and musa's nutrition. inshallah if there was any damage it will soon be resolved.
this feels like one of those useless journal entries i used to write... here's what i did today, here's what's on my mind, blah blah blah. my small, insignificant world. any thoughts worth thinking, or sentiments worth feeling, are swamped under sludge at the bottom of the lake. ramadan should have cleared that sludge somewhat, but it's like it surged back - i LET it surge back - even before eid was upon me.
musa is starting to whine, and i must eat...
posted by Ayesha | 1:27 PM
2 Comments:
There you go! That's a perfect post (NOT journal writing). Its a lovely post! You have it in your genes :-)
I'm worried about the milk supply too, man. Maybe the perpetual exhaustion is affecting us? Or maybe 6 months just has a natural drop?
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